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Saturday, November 21, 2009 Fall 2004   VOLUME 1 ISSUE 7  
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IN THIS ISSUE...
President's Letter
New Partners Give CPI the Largest U.S. Office Footprint
Staffing/IT Consulting—Offers and Counters Fly as the Floodgates Open in Financial Services
Interim-Staffing Services From Ayers—A Solution to Changing HR Needs
Executive Coaching—The Perk That Pays Back
OEC Consultant's Corner: The Dynamics of Conflict
Breaking the Cycle of Conflict
Ayers Professionals ‘Give Back’
Tech Tools for Today’s Wired/Wireless Candidates
Successful Landings
Staffing Services Staffs Up
AYERS REPORT

 Editor in Chief:
 Joan Caruso

 Writer:
 Catherine Carlozzi

 Designer:
 Roberta Martin

  If you have questions or
  comments on this
  month's issue, send your
  feedback to:
roberta.martin@ayers.com
Breaking the Cycle of Conflict

Typically, a cycle of conflict is triggered when someone says or does something to which you attribute a motivation.  If that attribution is something negative or threatening to you, you assign blame and respond with destructive behavior—fight or flight—which triggers a similar cycle within the other person.

There are two places you can short-circuit the cycle.

  1. The point of perception—intervene by working on not being so quick to attribute a motivation.  Once you know what your hot buttons are, work on desensitizing them.
  2. When a hot button has been pushed—engage in a dialogue that involves constructive behaviors; ask, don’t assume; find out where the other person is coming from; share your reactions honestly and move toward problem solving.

It isn’t easy.  Attribution happens very quickly, and emotions tend to get high.  The first step is to develop self-awareness through an assessment process such as the CDP.  The next step is to work with a coach on a plan for developing areas that are challenging for you and find ways to support that development.

Related article:
OEC Consultant's Corner:  The Dynamics of Conflict


[PRINTER FRIENDLY VERSION]
ARTICLES BY TOPIC:
Ayers Update
President's Letter
Ayers Professionals ‘Give Back’
Career Transition
New Partners Give CPI the Largest U.S. Office Footprint
Interim-Staffing Services From Ayers—A Solution to Changing HR Needs
Tech Tools for Today’s Wired/Wireless Candidates
Successful Landings
Staffing/IT Consulting
Staffing/IT Consulting—Offers and Counters Fly as the Floodgates Open in Financial Services
Staffing Services Staffs Up
Organizational Effectiveness Consulting
Executive Coaching—The Perk That Pays Back
OEC Consultant's Corner: The Dynamics of Conflict
Breaking the Cycle of Conflict
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